


Better Than Expected

by popatochisp



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underfell (Undertale), Coffee Shops, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, First Meetings, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, M/M, Other, Tsundere Papyrus (Undertale), Underfell Papyrus (Undertale)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2018-12-14
Packaged: 2019-09-18 07:12:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16990404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/popatochisp/pseuds/popatochisp
Summary: Trying to hold a strange skeleton's hand in front of your terrible ex andhopinghe'd play along...Probablynot your best plan.





	Better Than Expected

You felt so  _petty_.

You saw  _him_  saunter his smug ass into the coffee shop and the first thing you do is find the biggest, sexiest person in the place and sidle up to him, as if to say, ‘Hey, look who moved onto bigger and better, you prick!’

You hadn’t, of course. You were still painfully single after that shithead loser broke your heart and the very tall,  _very_  intimidating skeleton whose personal space you’re invading is giving you a look like he’s about to call you out.

No one had ever complimented your skill in forethought, but at least you were quick on your feet.

“Hold my hand so he gets jealous,” you hurriedly whisper to the skeleton.

He frowns at you. “WHAT—”

“Blue shirt,” you hiss, and the red lights in his eye-sockets dart quickly towards the bastard in question. “He’s my cheating ex-son of a  _bitch_  and I  _can’t_  let him see me still single, hold my hand!”

A calculating look comes over his skull, like a general planning a campaign. When he smirks, you don’t have to wonder why you instinctively picked  _him_  for this little con: he’s  _very_  attractive.

“I’LL DO YOU ONE BETTER,” he says, and that’s your only warning before you’re pulled flush against him, sharp claws curling around your hip with the propriety of somebody who owns you.

His timing is excellent: your garbage-can ex looks over just in time to see you snuggled up to a skeleton and he  _scowls_ , going red in the face.

You suppose he never had been very forward-thinking about monsters. This  _has_  to be sticking in his craw and you feel a burst of wicked satisfaction at the thought of how impotently furious he must be thinking that you’d gone from him to a monster in just a few short months.

It takes all the self-control you have not to laugh out loud until after he turns on his heel and storms out like a baby having a tantrum.

You look up at the skeleton, grinning widely. “Thanks,” you say. “I know I didn’t give you a lot of warning there, but that was perfect. Uh…”

“PAPYRUS,” your hero introduces himself. “I PRIDE MYSELF ON PERFORMING WELL UNDER PRESSURE. YOUR LITTLE RUSE WAS NO CHALLENGE AT ALL!”

You introduce yourself in return. “Sorry to drag you into my crap. It’s just…he’s such a  _bastard_ , I couldn’t let him  _win_ , y’know?”

“CONCEDE NOTHING TO YOUR ENEMY,” Papyrus nods in agreement, “NOT EVEN A COMPLETE AND UTTER IDIOT LIKE  _THAT_  ONE.”

You snort. “How’d you know he was an idiot? He is, you’re a hundred percent right, but what tipped you off?”

“HE CHEATED ON YOU.” It’s said so matter-of-factly that you’re momentarily stunned. “ANYONE WHO HAD SOMEONE LIKE  _YOU_  TO COME HOME TO AND WENT LOOKING ELSEWHERE IS A MORON.”

You are…suddenly very aware of the fact that Papyrus still has his arm around you. Your cheeks are starting to feel a little hot.

“I’LL BE FRANK,” he says. “I ADMIRE YOUR AUDACITY. YOU SEEM FIERCE…FOR A HUMAN. I LIKE THAT. I WOULD BE WILLING TO GO ON A DATE WITH YOU.”

“You…you would?”

“I WOULD! FEEL FREE TO BE HONORED BY MY REGARD, I’M SURE THIS IS A VERY MOMENTOUS OCCASION FOR YOU.”

………

Oh stars, this scary-looking hot guy was a huge  _dork_.

He’s even  _more_  attractive to you now.

“Do you…wanna get a coffee together?” you propose.

Papyrus’ eye-sockets go wide and startled. “WHAT, SERIOUSLY?”

You tamp down a giggle.  _He_  asked  _you_  out and now he’s surprised? “I mean…we  _are_  at a café already. It seems…convenient?”

He stares at you a second longer, sputtering before hastily covering, “O-OF COURSE, YOU SIMPLY CANNOT  _WAIT_  TO GO ON A DATE WITH THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS! I  _SUPPOSE_  I CAN HUMOR YOU, YOU EAGER LITTLE HUMAN. NYEH-HEH-HEH!”

_Cute…!_

For the first time since you broke up, you think you’re almost grateful to your shitty ex: he may have just inadvertently set you up with your next boyfriend.

**Author's Note:**

> Posting some drabbles of mine separately just because! Originally from my collection, Bag of Bones, where this and the rest of my drabbles so far can be found.
> 
> Thanks for reading! :)


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